“Working Out VS. Being Fit To Live”
Have you ever wondered why exercise and getting healthy is called “working out?” Why would anyone want to do something that contains the word “work” in it? Exercise, being healthy, and living a life full of vitality has lost the true reason for “why.”
Depending on where you live in the world, exercise can take on many different meanings. For the sake of not writing a book, I am going to focus on what it’s like in the gorgeous, sunny state of California, where the weather permits exercise pretty much 365 days a year, and where I have been located for over 45 years.
Photo Credit Jennifer Burke
I’ll begin by stating that California is NOT the easiest place to hide imperfections. There is a significant amount of pressure to look young and fit in order to be accepted. The messages to be perfect come from society, peers, friends, media, and television, and these unrealistic expectations do not impart health. Most of what you see, read, and hear is below average weight, extremely low body fat, often sensationalized by celebrities and the use of photoshop.
The unrealistic mania does not stop with the media, it extends to “fad” diets as well. These diets are extreme and limited in calories and nutrients. They aren’t created for health, but for maximal weight loss done in short periods of time. As a $71 billion (yes billion) dollar industry, these diets are designed with gimmicks to sell products and make money; they play on insecurities in order to do so. Always beware of the “if it sounds too good to be true” bell going off in your head.
As a Certified Personal Trainer for over 25 years, I have seen a lot! And, as a young trainer in my twenties, this industry promoted competition to “look” the part. Like many young females who deal with insecurity about appearance, I would take drastic diet measures, relentless exercise classes and training routines that only a twenty-something can partake in. I felt amazing and had a rock hard body, but inside I still felt insecure and as if I had to keep pushing...it was never good enough, and I was never good enough. Even though I was on top of my game, and I was implementing everything I had been taught to get to what I thought was “healthy”, I still focused on my “flaws.”
As a young woman in her early 20s, I was training for bodybuilding shows, getting recognition as one of the few female trainers in the late 90’s, and creating a business I was truly passionate about. Not to mention, this was the training I was teaching to my clients, because “if it’s not broken, why fix it?” I had no connection between my mind, body and spirit, I was simply a workout machine, all about the physical, how I looked to others vs. how I felt on the inside.
Q: What drove you in your twenties to be fit and healthy, if anything at all? Take a mindful moment right now and maybe write that down. What was your “why” for getting into shape? Or what was the reason why you did not work out?
It could be that you needed to lose weight, gain weight, be healthy, sports specific, wedding, or just because you wanted to look good. How did your workouts look? How did it make you feel? What was the driving force behind your workouts? What did your “pictured” body image look like? Was it realistic?
Or, were you ignoring all of the exercise craze and just not wanting to workout at all? For some of us, the unrealistic pressure of looking a certain way stops one from exercising and trying to be healthy because it feels so overwhelming and shameful.
In my thirties, I was still doing my “thing.” Not feeling threatened by how I looked but driven to make sure I didn’t lose what I attained in my twenties. I was still training my clients to the best of my ability and the current scientific information available at that time. I was training according to what my certifications taught me. In order to gain more knowledge, I would study and read everything about bodybuilding, fitness, health, and nutrition. Then, applying this knowledge as a trainer and teaching this to my clients so they could lose weight to get to their desired goals.
Q: If you are in or approaching your thirties, what is your workout like during this time in your life? Has it changed much since your twenties? Have you noticed how you talk to your body, is it different from your twenties? Are you more critical or concerned? Has “life” gotten in the way of you staying fit? Has it taken the back burner because of family, marriage, kids, or your job? What is society and the media saying now about how you should look? Do you feel more pressure, or do you feel more comfortable in your maturing body?
Then, before we know it, the thirties have flown by, and we are now in our forties. This is when we start to notice headlines stating things like, “40 is the new 20.” These kinds of messages add so much pressure and unrealistic expectations on what we should look like as we age. Why is it shameful in this society to simply look one’s age?
This is the decade when my eyes began to open, my mind a bit more curious about why I worked out and how I was training my clients. The end goal was always about the physical look of my body, and my client's body. But now, prevention for osteoporosis, diabetes, joint inflammation, arthritis, belly fat, and maintaining or increasing heart endurance were more of a concern.
This is when I began to expand my knowledge into yoga. I became a Master Yoga teacher in Vinyasa Flow and Kundalini Yoga. At first, it was so intriguing how yoga made me sore in places I never knew existed. It was deep in the belly of the muscles, and I felt more invigorated and alive after my classes. It was so liberating, and I couldn't wait to integrate this into my personal training style.
Teaching my clients how to move their bodies with the breath, hold a pose, and learn how to balance their strength and weakness within their bodies opened up a whole new world to the people I have been honored to work with. I was mind blown by the changes I not only witnessed in my body, but in my self awareness, my esteem, my compassion for self and others, and my insight. And, the cool thing is, I began seeing this in my clients as well.
Those who integrated yoga compared to those that chose not to do so were astounding. Yoga brought more elongation, tone, balance, and strength. Learning how to breathe properly expanded their lung capacity which allowed more developed strength within all the muscles, ligaments, and tendons.
Not to mention the spiritual and nutritional benefits! In yogis, diets are typically vegetarian, or vegan. A body builder is all about the meat and protein. I ate like a bodybuilder for over 30 years before I experimented with incorporating one meatless meal per day.
Over time, it evolved into full veganism. I’m by no means advocating a vegan only diet, but maybe be open to the idea of trying this even for one meal or for one day a week. Just a fun fact, one of our largest animals, the elephant, is a vegetarian!
For some of you it may click, like it did with me. I felt lighter, less bloated, less inflamed, and overall more energetic. For others, your body may need the meat in order to feel energized and full. Play with it and see what feels good for you, this is no easy task to dive into, so be gentle with yourself. There is a balance and formula to making sure you receive all the nutrients you need to sustain a healthy vegetarian/vegan diet. But, once you learn, it’s as easy as eating how you do now.
If this sounds exciting and intriguing, connect with me. While I am not a licensed nutritionist, I am truly passionate about sharing my knowledge so that others can gently transition into a vegetable based nutritional program. I can share recipes, restaurants, and quick easy meals that taste amazing - it’s all in the seasoning! Insert link
So, I ask you, what are your forties looking like within your body and spirit? Are you too distracted by where your life is financially? Maybe you're questioning whether you have your funds set up for your children, retirement, and an end game to the rat race?
But, have you considered, how am I going to “feel” later in life? Am I where I want to be physically, mentally, and spiritually? At this stage, there’s still a lot of living to do! Ask yourself, am I actually living? Am I present and connected to myself? Or am I allowing my health to just be what it is? Are you putting yourself as a priority so you can be your best self as your life unfolds?
Now, I’m in my early fifties. Still exercising, but with a different mission and goal for not only myself, but for every person I am blessed to guide. Life should be lived feeling good, strong, and balanced. The wheel of life is more than just how you look, it’s how you feel and what you say when you look in the mirror. Learning to love every morsel of every part of you will allow you to heal perfectionism and self loathing. I am here as a coach, to support, to encourage, to team up with, to listen, to help, and to assist you in moving toward obtaining health and vitality to live your best life!
It doesn’t matter how old you are, what your goals are, or how you envision what your body will look like. What matters is that you develop a self awareness of not just your physical body, but what your mind is saying about your body, how you are feeding your body, and noticing if there is balance.
If you are fifty or above, how do you feel? Not just on the outside, but the inside too? You see, it doesn’t matter what age you begin to understand your body and all its gifts. What matters is that you love your body, mind, and spirit enough to get to know who you are. Learn about yourself without trying to be what you or others think you should be. Give yourself the greatest gift of all, and others will want what you have...the confidence to love your body fully, that there are no flaws, but the most amazing unique person that can only be filled by YOU!
Thank you for spending a little time with me here as we explored these questions. Remember, you do not have to walk the path toward health and fitness all by yourself. No matter what age, size, or shape you are in, I will partner with you toward your goals.
I invite you to contact me if you are interested in diving into being “fit to live” and release the “work out” once and for all!
May Love Surround You Always,
Kelli
Contact info:
Cell: (626) 367-2607
Email: KBfitUBfit@gmail.com
